Weddings

All couples who get married at Bloomingdale Church are required to fulfill the following:

1. Meet with one of our pastors to discern whether Bloomingdale Church can host your wedding.

2. Watch six premarital DVD’s and meet with the pastor or assigned mentor couple six times following these steps:

a. Watch the assigned video session together in the same room at the same time.  (See schedule for sessions.) The videos are available on the web.  Go to www.marriage101online.com using the Bloomingdale Church’s assigned code.   Use the Bloomingdale Church code to get the on-line video sessions and PDF of the study notebook at the discounted price ($59) on their website is “5QL5S”.  Print out a free copy of both the Men and Women’s Workbook (free) or purchase the hard copy of the two notebooks from their website.

b.  Fill in the blanks in the workbook for the assigned session.

c. Write out all the Scriptures verses in your workbook in the place that they are mentioned during the session.

d.  Call to make an appointment for the next session after you have completed the video lesson and written your answers.

e.  Bring both workbooks to the pre-marital counseling session.  The pastor will review both workbooks.  Be sure that the lessons are completely filled out and the Scripture verses are written in as well.

3.   Attend worship together at least six times at Bloomingdale Church. (Be sure to sign the weekly register when you attend.)

Back to the Basics series

Premarital Counseling #1            Session one: Marital Expectations

Premarital Counseling #2            Session two: Communication  and Emotional Intimacy

Premarital Counseling #3            Session three: Personality Differences

Premarital Counseling #4            Session four: Conflict Resolution

Premarital Counseling #5            Session five: Spiritual Intimacy

Premarital Counseling #6            Session six & seven:  Money part one and part two

An alternative: If there is an opening, the couple may be able to substitute attending the Alpha Marriage class (7 sessions) which is offered in the fall and spring at Bloomingdale Church in place of the  required six premarital counseling classes listed above.  See one of the pastors concerning this option.

The elements of the wedding ceremony include the traditional wedding vows and a short personalized promise and generally takes about 30 minutes. Other elements that the couple want to include in the ceremony will be considered.

Sanctuary Use Fee: A $300 fee for the use of the sanctuary must be received in the church office in order to reserve the facility for the wedding date.  Make checks payable to “Bloomingdale Church” and mark it “wedding” with your name on the check. This fee pays for the use of the sanctuary, the utilities, set up and cleaning. The church is aware that this amount is a modest amount compared to what most organizations charge and does this intentionally to help couples control wedding costs. In return, the church asks that the couple and wedding party act responsibly and with thoughtful care for the church facility. Church availability is on a first come first served basis, though church members families are given priority in June each year. 

All members of the wedding party should be present at least a half hour before the wedding.  A rehearsal with all of the wedding party, musicians and other participants is required the evening before the wedding.

Other details for the couple to address: -The couple is responsible to make their own arrangements with the musicians of their choice for the wedding. There is a piano and keyboard available in the sanctuary. -Arrange for someone to be their lobby host to direct guests, collect any wedding gifts, and after the wedding to remove personal items, bows, runners, etc. -Inform the florist, musicians and photographers that the church office is open Monday-Friday 9AM-4PM and Saturday from 7-10AM if they wish to see the sanctuary area i or make deliveries.

Sound System: For smaller weddings, it is not necessary to use the sound sound system. In larger weddings (Ex. over 175 people) it is helpful to utilize the sound system. Using microphones and/or playing prerecorded music (CDs) requires that one of the church’s sound operator be present. If the couple wants to have the sound system, they are responsible to engage an approved sound/screen team memberand give him/her a $75 honorarium at the rehearsal (Remember, they give 4-6 hours of their time for the rehearsal and ceremony.)   Others will not be granted permission to operate the church equipment. The couple should finalize the above details at least six weeks in advance and communicate all expectations with the pastor at that time, not later.

If a center runner is used (normally provided by the florist) it should be at least 100 feet in length.  No real rose petals can be dropped on the floor by the flower girls because the petals tend to stain the carpet. (Use artifical petals.) There are numerous restrooms for the wedding party to dress and a closed area (the south lobby) that serves well as a waiting area for the girl’s bridal party before the ceremony. No food or drinks are permitted in the facility except in the kitchen. No children may be left unattended in any area of the church during the rehearsal or ceremony. No smoking anywhere in the church building. Smoke detectors located in every room (including the restrooms) will automatically detect any trace of smoke and trigger a loud disruptive alarm that immediately dispatches the fire department who insist on a complete evacuation of the facility. Saturday weddings must be scheduled in the morning or early afternoon. All pictures in the sanctuary must be completed by 3:30 PM when the worship team arrives set up the sanctuary for the weekly Saturday night worship hour. Sunday weddings may begin any time after 2 PM. Friday (or weekday) weddings normally may be scheduled any time.

If the couple opts to enlist a wedding coordinator, the coordinator assures that the wedding party is lined up and ready to enter the sanctuary for the ceremony on time. Often, a wedding coordinator also addresses the other details listed above. Otherwise these details are the couple’s responsibility.

(This can be altered in consultation with the pastor)

PRELUDE: Seating mothers/lighting candles. Ushers pull runner (if using one).

PROCESSIONAL: (Standing for the bride)

WELCOME:

DECLARATIONS OF CONSENT

Jim, do you desire to make the lifelong covenant promise of marriage to Mary this day ________ in the year of our Lord 2010 at the Bloomingdale Church in Bloomingdale, IL?   (“I do.”)

Mary, do you desire to make a lifelong covenant promise of marriage to Jim  this day _______ in the year of our Lord 2010 at the Bloomingdale Church in Bloomingdale, IL?   (“I do.”)

Parents, please stand Parents:

____,  Do  you hereby release the responsibility of your son into the loving  care of Mary  who will be his wife, confidant and loving life partner as long as they both shall live?  (“Yes, we do.”)

_____ Do you hereby release the responsibility of your daughter to the care of Jim  who will be her husband, confidant and loving life partner as long as they both shall live?  (“Yes, we do.”)

To Father of the Bride: Who gives this woman to be married to this man?  (“Her mother and I.”)

SCRIPTURE READING:

PASTORAL CHARGE:

THE VOWS: (Repeated phrase by phrase at the pastor’s repetition.)

Jim: I take you Mary to be my  wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to honor until death do us part.

Mary: I take you Jim to be my husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to honor, until death do us part.

THE PERSONAL VOWS: ( A few sentences that the groom and bride compose and repeat from a written card that they can read in the ceremony. (Bring these promises written legibly on a card to the rehearsal.)

CONGREGATIONAL AFFIRM AWill all of you witnessing these promises do all in your power to uphold ______ in their marriage covenant?@ (“We will.”)

EXCHANGE OF RINGS “This is the symbol, of my eternal covenant to you this day.”

LIGHTINGING UNITY CANDLE AND SONG

PRAYER

PROUNCEMENT By the authority vested in me in the state of Illinois as a minister of the gospel I pronounce you husband and wife.

THE KISS You may kiss the bride.

THE PRESENTATION I am privileged to present to you ______________.